You get about 75 million hits when searching google with keywords New + Year’s + Resolution. Everywhere I turn, it seems someone else is offering me THE top 5 tips for having my best year ever!!!
You’ve seen this, too, I’m sure and I’m curious: has it proven helpful to you? No? Yes? No matter. Let me add my voice to the cacophonous mess.
I was at the gym last night and overwhelmed at the staggering difference between the average number of people working out on any given night last month as compared to the zoo that was last night.
My husband commented that this was kinda cool. Health and fitness are good things to acheive and he wanted to celebrate the effort of those new to these goals. I rolled my eyes (how coach-like of me!) and said, “I know I can tend a little cynical, but how many of these folks do you think will be here in six months?”
Because I work with people on change all the time, I know how absolutely challenging it can be to sustain, especially without support. And for many people, New Year’s Resolutions are empty promises to themselves, often borne out of what they think they should do, not borne out of who they really are and what they really want. They often don’t even solve any existing problems which, quite frankly, is a real shot in motivation’s foot.
So if you’re among the masses who have identified any resolutions/goals/intentions for 2010 (I have), let me offer two bits of advice:
1. Ensure that it actually solves a real problem that you have (e.g., I will perform my physical therapy exercises three times a week because the pain caused by my poor posture is impeding my ability to function well)
2. Don’t commit to it if you don’t really want to
David Allen said, “Most of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not keeping agreements they’ve made with themselves.”
It’s counterintuitive to all the New Year’s hype, perhaps, but I seriously urge you to let go of making any agreements with yourself that you don’t anticipate keeping. I want you to have a very successful, meaningful and prosperous year. If that means letting some resolutions go, then by all means, take this coach’s suggestion and do just that!
Tags: change, goals, holidays, sustainability
Amen to that… why create an annual list of “shoulds” that get dropped by February. Totally ditto on the gym thing. 1st 3 weeks of January are the worst of the year (for those of us regulars) because it is jammed with short-timers who vanish. Sure there are some folks who start new and keep the commitment – to you I say “You go!!”. but for the rest…give yourself permission to let it go and do the things you really want or need to.
I completely agree! What’s worked for me is to “brand” my year, to give it a feeling in my mind that describes the major growth that will take place (2008 was the year of becoming professional entrepreneur, 2009 was the year of my business brand, and 2010 is the year of the voice). I find that branding really guides decisions and actions in a way that memorizing a committing to a goal list really can’t. And for those small tweaks you do make to your schedules, I recommend staying flexible and letting the goal evolve as needed.
Paula – EXACTLY!
Liz – I love how you construct your year around a brand (the word “theme” also comes to mind). It sounds like a much more holistic – and inspired – approach. Can’t wait to hear your voice ring loud and clear throughout 2010!